Horatio's thoughts
by Errol's Feather
Summary: Calleigh is in a coma at the hospital after being shoot and Horatio is by her side thinking. The first in a series of stories.


_**Athours Note : **_Special thanks to Bola, who helped me see some of the gramatical errors in my ways.

**DISCALIMER:** I don't own CSI Miami and i don't make any money from it.

_**Horatio's Thoughts.**_

Horatio was sitting beside Calleigh's bedside at the hospital. She had been laying there in a coma for a week hooked up to the machines. All the time as she had been there, Horatio had never left her side. How could he, it was his best friend, his bulletgirl, who was laying there. He couldn't bare the thought of her waking up scared and alone wondering where she was and how she got there. So he sat patiently just watching her and thinking.

He remembered the first time she had walked into his life, she was a little over 20, but still smarter then most woman her age, and her knowledge about weapons was why he hired her in the first place.

The day she arrived he was working in his office, but was interrupted by a knock on the door.

"Come in," Horatio shouted, annoyed by the fact that he could not make heads or tails of a case.

The door opened and a young woman with blonde hair and sparkling green eyes entered and said, "Hey, I'm Calleigh Duquesne. I know I'm a little bit early, but I hope it is okay."

She was dressed in jeans and a white top and looked a bit shy and confused. Horatio took her hand and said, "Horatio Caine, please sit down so we can talk."

Calleigh sat down and Horatio said, "I have looked at your resume, impressive, that's why I want you here. So is it true what people say about you and ballistics?"

"Yes, I know every weapon and gun that ever was, how they work, and how to take them apart, put them together and more," she said. There was just something about her who caught his eye, he didn't know if it was that she was so honest, her southern charm or the sound of her voice, but he found out that he wanted to test her just for fun so he said, "Hmmm, I want to put that to a test, here is three guns, take them a part and put them together again in less then 8 minutes." Then he gave them to her. She took them and did as he said in less then five. As she did it in a way so he could see how much she enjoyed it. When she was done, she gave them back, smiled and said, "Piece of cake."

"So it would seem," he thought, but said, "So when can you settle in and start to work and can I also assume that you have a place to stay and a duty weapon?"

"I have a place to stay that will do for now, several duty weapons and I can start at once," she answered and smiled. She didn't seem shy any more. Only eager to get going, he understood at once that this was the woman he had been looking for.

"I have a case here, and I need help, will you take a look at it?" he asked and smiled back at her.

"Of course," she said. He showed it to her and since that day she had been his second hand.

He smiled when he thought about it, hiring her was one of the best decisions he hade ever made. And the fact that he didn't know that she lived with her father at that time, he actually didn't find out for a couple of years later when she had her own apartment.

* * *

Horatio started to think about the relationship between Calleigh and her dad, it was a bumpy road. He knew her father always promised her to stop drinking, and he managed to stay sober for long time before he turned to the bottle again. But when he did so, Calleigh's world fell to pieces by trying to get him back on his feet again. Horatio had seen how sad, disappointed and tired she became every time it happened. Horatio still remembered the DUI incident a couple of years back when Calleigh's dad thought he killed someone with his car. Horatio wondered if he knew which impact it had on Calleigh. He also wondered what her father was doing these days and why he hadn't been to see her yet.

Horatio looked at Calleigh even with all the tubes and instruments she still looked beautiful, like a sleeping angel. He only hoped that would wake up soon so could see her beautiful green eyes and her smile and hear her voice again.

* * *

Horatio thought a week back on how she got here. The two of them were following up on a case and went to the suspect's house. They had knocked on the door, but no one answered, so they tried again. Then suddenly the door opened, shots were fired and Calleigh and the suspect lay on the ground. Horatio had run up to her and knelt down beside her putting pressure on the wound in her chest. She looked up at him, for the first time he saw fear in her eyes and she said, "Horatio, I'm scared, please don't leave me."

"I promise. I will stay here with you, if you will just stay here with me," he said and smiled to her. She nodded weakly and then she was gone.

And now she was laying there sound a sleep, and he couldn't leave her. Horatio knew he should have been working, but this time he had no intention to break his promise and leave her.

He thought about all she hade been trough and how strong she was, and hoped she was strong enough to survive this. He needed her. The lab and his life wouldn't be the same without her so he folded his hand and said, "Dear God. Please don't take her away from me. I couldn't bare to go on without her. She is the reason that gives my life meaning and the reason to why I get up in the morning. So if you can hear me, please let her wake up."

Then he took her hand in his and started to cry tears of sadness and desperation.

* * *

Calleigh's father, Kenwall Duquesne and Alexx stood outside the door and watched Horatio as he cried.

"Has he been here long?" Kenwall asked.

"He hasn't left her side all week," Alexx answered. She knew Horatio loved her, just not that much.

"Hmm, he must really love her then," Kenwall concluded.

"Yes, Duke, and apparently very much. I just hope she wakes up, if not he will be crushed. He has already lost a wife, if he loses the love of his life too, I'm not sure how he can go on," Alexx said sadly.

"Trust me on this, my little lamb chop in there is the strongest person I know, she will wake up," said Kendall and watched his daughter truth the window, hoping and paying that he was right. Then they went in to join Horatio.

* * *

It was midnight and Horatio was sleeping with his head on Calleigh's bed. Then Calleigh quietly opened her eyes and saw him. She smiled, happy that he had kept his promise. She looked at him. He looked so peaceful, like nothing in the world could bother him.

Calleigh looked around wondering how long she had been at the hospital, starting to remember everything about how she had gotten there. Calleigh slowly let her fingers glide through Horatio's red hair.

He sat up and looked at her with sleepy eyes and said, "Bulletgirl, you are awake, finally."

He gave her a glass of water. She drank and said, "I can't believe you never left me. How long have I been here?"

"A week. I promised I wouldn't leave you, so I didn't," Horatio said and smiled at her, glad that she finally had woken up.

"But Horatio, you shouldn't have, you probably have a lot of work to do," she said, feeling a little bit bad since he had put her in front of his work, but at the same time she thought it was kinda sweet.

"You are more important to me than all my work, don't worry about it, the others are handling it jus fine Calleigh," Horatio said in a mild voice, which made her feel so much better.

"Thank you for saying that, you are so sweet," she said.

"So how are you feeling?" he asked in a concerned tone.

"Tired, confused, dizzy, but other than that OK," she said, her voice was still a little bit groggy.

"Do you want to sleep again?" Horatio asked kindly.

"No, maybe later, could you do me some favors?" she asked.

"Anything sweetheart, what do you need?" he asked.

"Well, I don't really need these things, but I feel a lot better if I had them here. If you could get my grey Ladysmith, and my weapons magazine from my desk at work, and maybe a candy bar or something, I'm kinda hungry," she said and looked at him with begging eyes.

"Of course, I'll be back as soon as possible," Horatio said and went back to the lab to get what she asked for.

* * *

Horatio opened Calleighs desk drawer and found one of her favorite guns, the grey Ladysmith. He didn't exactly see what she needed it for in the hospital, but he guessed she felt naked without the gun, so he took it out. He also took out the magazine she requested. When he lifted it a picture suddenly fell out between the pages. He looked at it, it was of himself and Calleigh in the lab a couple of days after she started. It was Speddle who had taken it. He couldn't believe that she still had it.

Then his mind went over to Speddle for a while. His death. On how Calleigh had talked to him and hugged him in the wardrobe, for the first he could see she had been crying a lot, event though she would probably never admit it. And how she had been there for him and supported him through afterwards. Then he thought about Marisol and how crushed he had been, and how Calleigh hadn't left his side for a day after that. She had comforted him in so many ways, that he couldn't count the all. But she was her forever grateful for it. Then his mind wandered over to how he hadn't been there for her and supported her after Hagen had died. He felt like a complete fool about it to. He shook it of and went upstairs to the break room to see if he could find a candy bar or something like that.

* * *

Horatio walked into the break room and run into Natalia, Eric and Ryan which looked surprised to see him there.

Ryan looked at him and asked, "What are you doing here with Calleighs things we thought you were with her?"

"I'm the boss here, so I may come and go as I please. And I have Calleighs things since she woke up and asked me to get them for her," Horatio said and started to search for a candy bar with no luck.

The others looked at him and finally Natalia said, "She's awake, how is she, and what are you looking for?"

"She is tired and confused, but other than that fine. I'm looking for a candy bar since she wanted one, do any of you have one?" Horatio asked.

"If you wait a minute I will get one," Ryan said and returned shortly after and gave it to Horatio.

"Thanks Ryan, I got to go as I want to get back to her as soon as possible," Horatio said and went out the door.

"Jeez, he got it bad, I've never seen him like this," Eric said. The others nodded.

"I think it is kinda sweet. Last one back to the DNA lab buys drinks at the bare on Friday," Natalia said and headed for the door.

"You wish," Eric and Ryan said and run after to get there before her. Even if the clock was over midnight the three of them was still working to keep everything going since Horatio wasn't there, but they didn't mind since they knew he needed to be with Calleigh, and he would be back as soon as she was feeling better.

* * *

The clock was around two when Horatio was back at the hospital. Calleigh was sitting up in the bed staring out in the dark.

Horatio walked up to her and asked, "Do you want me to turn on the light?"

"No, it's too bright, me head isn't that OK yet," she said tiredly.

"But you shouldn't sit completely in the dark, if you can wait, I will fix it," Horatio said and

disappeared before she had time to reply. Horatio was back five minutes later and lighted up the room with candles.

Calleigh smiled to him and said, "Horatio are you sure you are allowed to light up candles in the hospital?"

"No, but I don't think you are allowed to have your gun here either, and frankly I don't care right now," he said. She smiled. She couldn't believe that he had bent the rules for her. Horatio gave her the gun, the magazine and the protein bar and said, "Ryan sends his love with this Granola bar."

Calleigh laughed and replied, "I'll bet he does."

"But tell me, what do you need your gun for in the hospital, don't you feel safe her without it?" Horatio asked.

Calleigh looked at him like she was wondering if she could trust him and said, "Yes I feel safe, especially with you here. It's just I don't know, I feel naked or like something is missing if I don't have a gun."

"You're not like other girls you know," Horatio said. Calleigh looked down like he had said something wrong, and Horatio added, "Which is why I love you so much."

"You what?" she asked and looked surprised.

"I love you with my heart and my soul, and I was wondering if you was interested in dating me or and be my girlfriend?" Horatio asked back and looked a bit embarrassed.

Calleighs face brightened up enough to light up the whole room, and her eyes sparkled like diamonds and she said, "Of course I would, I was just waiting for you to ask. What took you so long?"

He looked at her in the lights of the candles she looked even more beautiful than usual. He smiled and said, "I don't know, I was afraid you would turn me down I guess."

"I would never do that, you're the greatest man in the world, I will give you my heart if you give me yours," she said in a serious tone.

"I'll give you my heart and everything else to show that I'm wordy of your love, my beautiful Bulletgirl," he said and looked into her beautiful green eyes before he kissed her.

* * *

_Feedback always welcome and very much appriciated :o)_


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